Sweet Baby Lillie

My sweet Lillie has been sick for the last week. The miserable-for-the-whole-family kind of sick. I won't go into all the gruesome details (like the subtle stench of puke that won't go away or like waking up next to a puddle of diarrhea because her diaper had leaked), but I have washed sheets and couch cushion covers far too many times in seven days.

Today she seems to be feeling better, however this isn't the first time I've thought so this week. We've been to the doctor twice so far. The first time, it was decided she must have some kind of virus and should be over it soon. Six days later (today), I took her back and he thought it may be more bacterial or parasitic. So....they sent us home with three test tubes and a little jar for, ya know, collection... It's now after 4 pm, and of course there's been nothing to collect. I suppose it'll be okay with me if I never have to collect "things" for testing, but it would sure be nice to know the cause of this horrendous experience.

One good thing about the last week is that I've gotten to take advantage of lots and lots of cuddle time with Lillianna. Like any sick baby, she has wanted to be held and loved on constantly! She even found a more pitiful way to say "mama" so she was sure to get extra attention. Luckily, Nathaniel and Gabriella are older and busier throughout the day and don't mind that she's been getting more "love".

Our Lillie Billy, (at one point she only had a couple teeth and huge gaps, so Justin thought this nickname was appropriate, especially since we're from Arkansas... ya know, hillbilly) has been such a blessing. At first, news of her coming made us panic a little... Justin was in school, working part-time, I couldn't find a job worth taking, and we were BROKE. And Gabrie was still so young; we weren't "ready" for another baby yet. Luckily, all of that was temporary. Justin finished school, got two job offers (we really struggled with that decision!), and it was almost time to welcome our third baby into the world.

Finally, the week of her due date arrived! (I'm not a very pleasant pregnant person). Monday I had a false alarm. We spent a couple hours at the hospital to make sure everything was okay. I think it was just wishful thinking. Nothing on Tuesday. Wednesday, contractions ALL DAY LONG. That was fun. Wednesday night they got a little stronger. I just knew this had to be it! ALL NIGHT LONG, I laid in bed, trying to get some sleep next to my snoring husband. Of course, that didn't happen. Those blasted contractions...not close enough to have a baby, yet too close to get any rest. I woke Justin up a few times to let him know my progress. He woke up just long enough to acknowledge and then rolled back over to snooze. :) Around 1:30 am, I couldn't take it anymore. Contractions were about 6 minutes apart and absolutely excruciating. I woke Justin up again and told him to call the hospital. He said I should wait a little longer. HA! EASY FOR HIM TO SAY! I think I waited about 5 more minutes...

Once we got to the hospital and checked in, and taken to an exam room, it was about 2:45 am. By the time they decided I was really in labor (like I didn't know), they took me to my room and I was already at a 9! I can remember thinking she seemed to hurt more than the other two kids. She actually made me scream. At one point, we were very scared because suddenly the nurse told me, very sternly, to stop pushing. Turns out the cord was wrapped around her neck, twice. Very scary.  Finally at 3:12 am, we welcomed Lillianna Mattison into the world. She was a perfect 7 lb 7 oz.

She's the baby of the family, and she plays her part well! She's sensitive, dramatic, and loves to be spoiled. At times, the whole family HAS to sing to make her happy. So far, she is an easy-ish baby. Basically always happy, eager to please, clingy sometimes, and so very lovable. She fits right in! Everyday is a new, exciting chance to learn her more. I can't wait to see more of her personality as she gets older.

And, in case you were wondering, it is now after 10 pm and we went all day without me getting puked on, or having to change a yucky diaper. I'm very excited to say the test tubes are still wrapped in their package! Special thanks to my Honey Bun, who so graciously lived in a not-so-clean house this week, and was a great help with puke messes and diarrhea diapers after he got off work. I don't think he even gagged once! :)

We Will Never Forget

It's that time of year again. June. The month when so many parts of my life were drastically changed. Ruined even. I miss the days when June didn't have a whole lot of significance to me. Except for it being the month that one of my older brothers was born, nothing in June really meant much. Especially not June 9, 2009. Four years? Can that really be possible? I suppose it is possible...so much has happened since that day. I've gotten married, had two more kids, and moved 800 miles from home. I have three more nieces than I had that day. My (then) two-year old is now in 2nd grade and reads and writes, has a great interest in dinosaurs, and collects cool rocks for his geology-themed room.

Yet, as many things that have happened since June 9th, I can remember that day better than almost any day in my life. I remember every detail.

That handsome man was my big brother, Matthew, and my baby Nathaniel. I remember this moment in time so clearly. Matthew lived in Tulsa, and from time to time, we (this particular trip was my mom, a few siblings, and nieces and nephews) would go there to visit him. Usually we spent the day shopping or going to the zoo, and once he was done with work Ma would treat us all to dinner. This time we met him at Tulsa's Incredible Pizza. 
 
Matthew was a Geologist and a cyclist. The family would go watch his races, whenever they were close or when we were able. It was always so exciting to see watch him go by. I remember feeling so sad for him if he didn't do well. We always went to dinner afterwards.

 

Matthew or "Shew-shew" as I usually called him, was killed by a drunk a driver. He (along with two cylcing friends) was riding along a highway in Sand Springs, Ok. on a beautiful, sunny afternoon in June. One of his friends was also killed. It still seems unreal. Even while cleaning out his little apartment in Tulsa, it was unbelievable. I'm still asking "why?". The woman who killed him is now in prison....she won't be there long enough. I'm still trying to figure out how to forgive. That is what we're supposed to do, right? Easier said than done.

 

 

This picture was taken outside of Famous Dave's Barbeque in Rogers, Ar. We had just finished watching him compete in the Joe Martin Stage Race in Fayetteville, Ar. We went every year because it was so close to home. This was Mother's Day of 2009 and the last time I saw him.

 

Matthew was only 34 when he was taken from us. I wasn't near finished getting to know him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



"Mama So Mean" and Gabrie's a Princess

Tonight Gabrie is acting as my writing partner. The little Sweetie is supposed to be in bed, but her father, who is now sleeping (and snoring) quite peacefully on the couch, in a moment of weakness (which happens far more often than it should...he's wrapped around her tiny finger), decided it would be ok if she came downstairs and slept on the couch while he watched tv.

Of course, not even five minutes into it, Justin was sound asleep and Gabrie joined me on the floor with the laptop.

 

I know, a child her age should be in her own bed right now, but every once in a while, I don't mind the company. I'm not an early to bed kind of person (something I regret every morning). Whether I'm getting a head start on tomorrow's chores, watching episode after episode on netflix, or playing candy crush saga, I just can't usually bring myself to go to sleep at a decent time. Anyway, I enjoy this occassional one-on-one time with my kids. (It seems that time alone with each child individually is becoming harder and harder! I can't imagine how people with 5+ kids do it).

 

So tonight it's me and my Gabriella. (Who is also snoring peacefully on the couch now.) Today, this girl tested every single piece of patience in me. Ok, she does this everyday, but today was grocery day so it seemed a little more stressful. And I only forgot to use two coupons, so I'd say it was pretty much a success...but that's another story.

 

 I think most parents could agree, each child holds a special place in their heart. You don't have more or less love for any of them, but each one is just special to you in a different way. I can't begin to describe how special each of one of mine is to me! However, I can think of one word, especially after our shopping trip today, to say about Gabrie, and that word is CHALLENGING.

 

From day one, Gabrie has been a challenge. She was a challenge to give birth to (taking a short 21 hours of excruciating pain and misery... may not sound long to some, but my first took only 2 hours, so a long labor like that was a shock, to say the least.) As a newborn, she wouldn't sleep in her own bed, she was allergic to the cheap diapers, she even had to have a more expensive brand of diaper rash medicine! Almost nothing has been simple with Princess Gabriella. (she actually calls herself this). Oh, and if it can be climbed on, she WILL climb on it.

 

As a toddler, we noticed her speech wasn't progressing as it should. She is plenty smart, but just couldn't put it into words. At 21 months she began working with a speech therapist. At the time, she was ranked to be at a 15 month old level. Not horribly behind, but definitely in need of therapy. For me, it was a really disappointing discovery. Of course I was relieved that nothing more serious was wrong, but I can't express how discouraging and sad it was for me to not know what my baby wanted to say. She clearly HAD things to say, she just didn't know how to say them.

 

When we started therapy, her talk sounded more like the nonsense jibber-jabber most babies start out with. Justin and I understood maybe 10% of what she said, and other people understood even less than that. After six months, Gabrie jumped to the level of a 24 month old, and I could understand about 85% of what she said, while strangers could understand about 50%. Now almost three months later, Gabriella is exploding with conversation. We won't have another evaluation for another three months, but if I had to guess, I'd say we're close to understanding 95% of her words, and strangers are probably at 75%. It has been amazing to see the transformation, and especially amazing to understand what she has to say. I'm excited to see how the next evaluation goes and extremely grateful for the deeper bond we've developed with her, no matter what challenge each new word brings.

 

Her favorite things to say lately: "Mama so mean" and "Gabrie sad" any time she gets in trouble. And whatever you may try to distract her sadness with, she "doesn't like". Occassionally she calls me "Mommy" and I don't know why, and she's started calling Nathaniel "Bubby" instead of "Bubba". (He hates it! I think it's kinda cute.) And Justin went from being "Dada" to "Daday", then back to "Dada", and now "Daddy". Lillianna is "Nana".

 

She keeps us on our toes. She might possibly be the most misbehaved child ever, in the entire history of the world. But despite all her rotten-ness, she is also incredibly sweet. Her face just says "love" when she looks at her brother and sister....right before she pinches them for no reason. But seriously, she really is a sweet girl. I think we'll keep her, mess and all.