Addie: I just knew age six was when I was going to swim without a floatie!
Me: How did you know?
Addie: I just did. Plus I had a dream.
I like to go to Target on the weekends sometimes and browse alone. One Sunday afternoon, I did just that, and when I came home Justin told me Pennie ran to the door and said, "The no parent is home".
We had ice cream for dessert one night and Pennie wanted four scoops "because she is four". I gave her four tiny scoops and asked her, "How's that?" She replied, "it'll do."
Addie: Why'd you give me that look?
Me: You looked suspicious.
Addie: Nope! No suspicious on me!
Pennie: I want three nuggets. Okay, actually I want four.
We stayed in Orlando a couple nights on our vacation and we're those mean kind of parents who don't spend insane amounts of money to go to Disney--Gabrie was a little bitter about that--
Me: We'll see spaceships! (Kennedy Space Center)
Gabrie: No, we won't.
Justin: Yeah, we will. You can see where that one spaceship took off.
Gabrie: I don't want to see that. I wanna see Star Wars spaceships.
Justin: Well, those don't exist so... What's the name of that ship? The 'mandalorian?'
Nathaniel: No, that's a Star Wars show. It's the Millennium Falcon.
Justin: Oh.
While on vacation, we were all getting settled into bed when Pennie needed to use the bathroom. I was nursing Juliette to sleep, so when Pennie finished and needed some help wiping, Justin was the one on duty. Once he came back to bed and Pennie was back in her bed, he said to me, "I think her tummy is hurting a little." She came back for the bathroom again a few minutes later. He thought she'd be okay to clean up alone this time, but then she called out that she accidentally went in her panties too. I asked her, "how much is it?" and she replied, "Ummm. A lot." I told Justin he was gonna have to handle it because Juliette was still nursing.
He went back to the bathroom to help her and judging by the moans and groans from Justin, it was, indeed, a lot of poop.
Justin: Oh my gosh! This is so bad. She got it all over the toilet, Grace. I'm throwing these panties away. There's too much.
Pennie: Daddy, we don't throw away good things!
Justin: Pennie, these are not good.
It took him a good 20 minutes to get her cleaned off in a the tub and clean the toilet and once they were done, Pennie was looking on the bright side: "Daddy, at least there's some bathroom cleaner."
Julie: All done.
Gabrie: Perfecto!
Julie: Perfecto!
Beach vacations are relaxing, unless you have kids and have to set up a canopy for shade, carry bags full of water and snacks, eight beach towels, diapers, a camera, and all the beach toys. This was our 4th or 5th time setting up at the beach so I can understand where he was coming from...
Justin: How much did this canopy cost?
Me: $79. You're thinking about leaving it behind aren't you...
(we didn't leave it)
Nathaniel: I want to go walking downtown, not driving.
Me: Since when do you want to walk?
Nathaniel: I wanted to walk yesterday and then I had to wear a poncho. A RED poncho.
Me: WAKE UP!
Gabrie, sleep talking: Don't try to kill us when you wake us up!
Me: What do you mean?
Gabrie: I wasn't serious! I mean, bows and arrows can't kill you.
Nathaniel: But why can't she just put her in her seat? Why does she have to be so tacky?
(He obviously doesn't know what tacky means)
Justin: Looks like Zaxby's is open.
Lillie: NO! I hate Zaxby's!
Gabrie: What about their delicious toast?
Lillie: Well, that's the only thing I like.
Lillie: Mama, does it say rooster for the boys? (the restroom door)
Me: uh huh
Lillie: If hens were boys, that'd be perfect cause 'hens mens'.
Justin, apparently comparing Charleston with Savannah: You got Savannah out here, lookin' like a snack.
Me and Nathaniel: What??
Justin: Savannah's out here lookin like a snack. And then you got Charleston.
Me: What does that even mean?
Justin: I don't know. It could be an insult but I think it's a good thing.
(We did love Savannah, so it must have been a tasty snack. If I didn't already think my husband was weird though, that moment solidified it for me).
Justin: I'm going to bed soon and so are you. We've gotta leave out early tomorrow.
Nathaniel: What time?
Justin: Around seven.
Nathaniel: How are you gonna let me sleep till ten today and then jump me to seven?!
Gabrie: They're broccoli mountains! (The Smokies)
Addie, looking up animals on Google: Mana-- mammal.
Justin: Haha you were gonna say manatee instead of mammal.
Addie: I said the wrong word. Don't judge me.
Justin: We're gonna have pizza tonight.
Pennie: Don't get that pizza that made me poop in my pants!
Justin: Ugh. Thanks for reminding me Pennie. I almost forgot about that time you destroyed the bathroom.
During the course of a 4,000 mile car ride, we occasionally let the girls play games on the phone. Gabrie and Lillie started arguing over whose turn it was.
Gabrie: It's still my turn. I'm in the middle of the game. It's not Lillie's turn yet.
Justin: What video game are you playing? Monopoly?
Gabrie: No? (as if that were a ridiculous game to play on the phone). I'm playing scrabble.
Lillie: Gabrie, isn't it funny how the pizza place is "Dominos" and the game is "Donimos"?
Gabrie: Wait. Dom or Don... Donimos. Mama, is it donimos or dominos???
Lillie: It's Dominos, cause I just saw the sign. (She still thinks the game is donimos.)
Pennie: Nana, you should come to Arkansas and see Moomoo. She is so cute! (Pennie thinks Van Buren, where Ma and Pa live is Arkansas, and Fort Smith, where Nana lives, is not still Arkansas).
Lillie: Ma has so much candy in here! She never even talks about it! (The candy drawer in the kitchen that I guess the kids didn't really know about).
Nathaniel: I wonder what people will think about my walk... I wish I had some crutches to really sell it.
And of course, his favorite thing to say during August--
Nathaniel: But I have a lacerated liver and a contused kidney... (any time he wanted to get out of a chore, or wanted an extra snack, or literally any time he could bring it up).
