Some Not So Shocking News ;)

We're excited to announce our newest adventure for 2019--baby #6 is due this August! This past Tuesday, we finally got to hear the sweet sound of life from this new soul God has blessed us with. The kids sat quietly on the bed with me, (the quietest they have ever been in their whole life!), and listened intently while the midwife searched for a heartbeat. 

Penelope brags daily about being a "big sista". Adaleine asks me every single day "has the baby kicked yet?". Before that though, her question was, "are you sure you're 'preganant'?" Lillianna and Gabriella are hoping for twins. A boy and a girl, because "we've never had a baby brother before and we want another girl to play barbies with us". Nathaniel is happy with either one. I don't think he's holding his breath for a baby brother though. 😉 

Our plan this time, God-willing, is to have a home birth. Yes, that's right. This baby will be a TEXAN! Nathaniel and Gabriella were both born in Arkansas because we still lived there. And then Lillianna came in April, a month after Justin graduated from Spartan. Awaiting her arrival was the only thing keeping us in Oklahoma, so we decided to just stay at my parents house in Arkansas until she arrived, because we knew Oklahoma was not where we'd be living. At the time, Justin had two job offers, one in Texas and one in Colorado, and we hadn't yet decided which one to take but knew the best thing was to wait for Lillie to be born before moving away. She came a day early and Justin left for Colorado to start his new job and find us a house, just a week after she was born. We followed him three weeks later after he found us a beautiful house. (Still miss it!) In 2014, Adaleine joined us and it was during my pregnancy with her that I began researching home births, and falling in love with the idea. We met with two midwives, but ended up deciding to do something crazy... we planned on having her in Arkansas instead. So a few weeks before my due date, Justin drove the kids and me to Arkansas, and turned right back around to Colorado so he wouldn't waste time off before her birth. The plan was for Justin to come back a couple days before my due date; all my babies came the day before they were due, after all. What could go wrong? Miss Adaleine decided to arrive four days early. The second labor began, I called Justin and told him to leave NOW! He made the 12 hour drive in record time (with one potty break on the side of the road, one gas refill, and without any tickets), we went to the hospital and Addie came an hour later. And then it was Penelope's turn. We decided on the same plan we made with Addie, except this time we lived in Texas and it was only a 9 hour drive. Pennie came ten days early but with another twist--my water ruptured early that morning, but thankfully not enough to rush to the hospital, which allowed Justin enough time to get to Arkansas. Contractions didn't even start until after we got to the hospital, and she was born shortly after. 

I can't wait to find out what this sweet baby's birth story will be. Hopefully it will be the intimate, peaceful experience I've been dreaming about for five years. It will be an adventure either way. 

Happy Heart Day

Our homeschool co-op celebrates Valentine's Day at the skating rink every year. The kids had a wonderful time, loved making boxes and valentines for their friends (in true Grace fashion, we threw boxes together the day before. Glitter glue for the win!), and we came home with at least 150 cards with candy attached. Nathaniel skipped the box and valentines, but wasn't too cool to whip out his blades. (Or to help Addie around the rink several times. He's a keeper.) And yes, it was really actually warm enough for shorts. 82 degrees in February.

Kid Cuteness-January Edition

Normally I would document cute things my kids say or do in a Facebook status, but since I'm trying to limit Facebook time this year, I had to come up with a new way to remember those funny things they say. It meant saving it in a memo on my phone, and unfortunately that was harder to do than a quick FB post, but I'm going to get better. The reality of it is I'd almost have to record our entire day, because honestly, they say and do many hilarious things... but then I'd also have to remember the many feuds, attitudes, and bad behavior we encounter daily. The stuff that isn't supposed to happen between sweet, happy siblings. Like the current fight over a coloring book that I'm trying to drown out with the help of Alexa and The Lumineers.

Back to the cute stuff...

1. One night this month, Justin brought up our need for an escape plan in case we ever encounter a house fire. We discussed the basics with the kids before bed and tried to prepare them a little for what it could be like if they woke up to the house on fire. Of course there was concern for the cats; how would they get out?! I told them we'd try our best but it was most important to get the people out. Just after we finished discussing, said our good-nights, and prayed over everyone's night, Addie exclaimed, in all seriousness, "Daddy! What if there's a fire under your blanket??" Insert obligatory toot joke. Exploding laughter. I no longer recall who made the toot joke, probably the boy, but it could go either way. 

2. We just finished our Friday co-op and Justin was home early and off for the weekend, so we decided on a spontaneous trip to Dallas. I do all the packing for our trips and instruct the older kids what to bring to me so I can arrange it in the suitcase. It's a big job and even though wherever we go probably has a Wal-Mart, I tend to get a little stressed. I strive (and mostly fail) to be an organized person, and forgetting things we need is not organized! Lillie is a little shy, but don't be fooled: she comes to life at home and can be quite the comedian. And if you can imagine her serious little voice saying it, it's even cuter. "Lillie, did you get three pairs of socks?" "Oh, I got more than three. Now that's what I call -- BEING. PREPARED." We hit the road a couple hours later, and embarked on what felt like the longest drive of our life. Obviously it wasn't but we severely miscalculated just how far Dallas is from Midland. Justin doesn't like to make too many stops, especially since our destination was so close...we arrived at our hotel after 8, none of us had eaten dinner yet, and we were a little "testy". The next day was record cold temps (I'm guessing. All I know is it was freezing). Definitely not Zoo weather, huh Justin? So we opted for something indoors, the Dallas World Aquarium, along with 500 other guests that morning. Above the trail inside, there is all sorts of jungle-y vegetation; Pennie looked up and thought the vines were snakes. I told her, "no, those are just branches." Later, Justin tried to scare her by saying, "Pennie, look at all the snakes up there!" to which she frantically replied, "No, Daddy! Those are just 'ranches'!"

3. A couple Sundays ago was serious business for football fans around the nation. We watched both games, almost back to back. Don't tell Ma I actually somewhat enjoyed watching it this year. (The boys have corrupted me, Ma. It's not my fault!) I have to be the annoying girl watching though, and root against whoever Nathaniel is rooting for and ask him to explain the rules to me. Justin to Nathaniel: "Give up, Dude. I've tried explaining it to her for years." Anyway, miraculously both teams Nathaniel was cheering for won. He swore at the beginning that he was having really good luck that day, (I think it started earlier that morning when he found out the Oilers won the night before.) and that his teams would make a comeback and compete at the Superbowl and WHEN that happens, "Daddy has to take me to buy a lottery ticket, because I'm lucky today!!!!" That night they went to the convenience store and bought two tickets. The drawing was held a few days later, and Nathaniel Googled the results. He came to me with a slump in his shoulders, "Well, I didn't win the Powerball. BUT, I did learn that if you stack 1 billion, $100 bills on top of each other, it would be as tall as TWO Willis Towers in Chicago!" His disappointment turned so quickly into enthusiasm over that little fact.

4. Gabriella is very into pranks lately. She has gotten "stuck" in two trees, "not cleaned her room" at least a dozen times, and has plans of countless more, I am certain. The prank-er, might soon become the prank-ee.

See ya, 2018.

During the last days of the year, like most people, we've been planning out what we want the new year to look like for us as a family. Some of our goals are probably a little lofty-- like going a month completely without TV (we chose February. Haha!) but we're realistic too and have small resolutions, as well. Weight-loss, of course, made the list. Healthier habits, both for mind and body. More book-reading, less sugar, more exercise, less electronics, more productivity and better time management, less eating out, more date nights, less yelling, more love. One of my personal resolutions is less Facebook time. I waste an unbelievable amount of time there. If I could tally up the amount of time spent, it would not be pretty. For 2019, I want to spend far less time reading about people I barely know anymore, or even know at all, and more time living in the moment and being more intentional with my time. The last year FLEW by and I don't want to miss a moment of the next year! However, I do love how Facebook makes it so easy to document life events and even the more uneventful things we post about, I love seeing "my memories" and reading the cute things my kids used to say that would long be forgotten if I hadn't posted about it. I've decided instead to be a little more regular on my blog. I may share it on my Facebook page, and I may not. If you love us and want to know what we're up to in 2019, check back here! :)

Now, a look at 2018:
Nathaniel read a book about Tim Tebow earlier in 2017 and decided he wanted to do what Tim did and have zero carbonation for an entire year. We decided to join him in his challenge. He not only succeeded, but has decided to continue it in 2019. The rest of us fell off the wagon in May... but we did drink significantly less soft drinks than we ever have before. We will all try again in 2019. Nathaniel's self discipline amazed me!

We traveled to San Antonio, Marfa, and Dallas, Texas; Shreveport, Louisiana; Phoenix and Tombstone, Arizona. And we spent over 7 weeks in Arkansas to visit family. Justin went to Canada for the first time, spending a total of two weeks in Calgary, Three Hills, and Beaver Lodge. And then as a family, we vacationed in Edmonton later on in the year.

We visited museums and zoos, saw mysterious, hovering lights, roamed with cowboys and outlaws, took lots of pictures, celebrated birthdays and holidays, paid off lots of debt, said goodbye to friends, the kids and I took our first plane ride, acquired three cute kitties, buried a loved one, started a new job, endured sleepless nights, tears, tantrums, and black eyes, and we bought our first house. We've grown, we've achieved, we've messed up, and we've learned.

Here's to 2019. We hope for more adventures, successful resolutions, and less trips to the ER. 

Misunderstood

A simple Google search will show you image after image of moms cheering for the start of a new school year. This is what bothers me. Moms, who are essentially thrilled at the fact that someone else will be caring for her children. It isn't about homeschooling. It isn't about back to school pictures. I'm not against public school. I'm obviously a fan of homeschooling but that doesn't mean I think if you don't homeschool you're a crappy parent. I'm also a huge fan of my kids, so that's why memes like these don't make any sense to me. Are my kids impeccably behaved? Of course not. Do I think I'm a better parent? Nope. I fail everyday. There isn't a harder job in the world than being a parent and nobody has it down perfectly. But I can not, and will not ever understand how a person can jump for joy over their babies being gone all day long, five days a week, and for the majority of the year. I enjoy my kids! I don't need a break from them! There will be plenty of time for "breaks" when they're grown and off on their own, going to college, getting married and having babies. I totally get that it's overwhelming sometimes...I have FIVE for goodness sake.

 What kind of message do the meme's above send to kids who need their mom, though? "It's a joke! The kids are in on it too. They're laughing with her." I'd be laughing too if my mom were leaping all over the driveway like an idiot. But ultimately, jokes like these really say, "'Me time' means more to me than spending it with you." This attitude toward back to school will come back to bite 'em too... 

By all means, be excited for your kids' excitement about school. Be proud of them. Take their picture on the first day showing off their new clothes. Just don't throw a party cause you've been relieved of your parental duties for the day, Monday through Friday, and until next May. Enough of my opinions though. I just felt the need to clarify my stance on the subject because it was never intended to offend anyone or to toot my own horn. 

Lillie's Song

It was a saturday morning, exactly one year ago. It was supposed to be a normal day; Nathaniel had a soccer game that morning. We probably would've gone out for lunch afterwards (probably at chickfila). Instead, a few hours before his game was scheduled to begin, we were trying to make the all too common parental decision on whether to take our daughter to the doctor.

It happened over night. She had a cold; snotty nose, maybe a slight cough, but nothing serious. Until Saturday morning came. She was laying in bed between her daddy and me, and her breathing did not sound good. Chest caving in, short inhale, rapid exhale. It was worrisome, for sure. Something we've dealt with a few times before, but each time you sit and watch and ponder for a second "should we go?" 

I try not to be one of those crazy, hypochondriac moms. I fail, quite often. Almost every time I've taken one of the kids in to the doctor or ER, I feel silly. I'm just sure the nurses are laughing at me for being "that mom". I've learned over the years to assess the situation more thoroughly and to wait certain things out for a little while before panicking. I still Google and my searches almost always come back with the absolute worst scenario possible. I have finally learned that every bump on the head does not lead to a concussion. I've learned to let the fever do its job. I'm still working on the Googling part, although it is quite a handy resource to have. 

So while watching Lillianna breathe, and reading a few articles about labored breathing, I decided she should be taken to a doctor. Normally, if she's having a hard time breathing (which only happens when she gets sick with a cold or something), we have an inhaler to give her, but about a week before this episode, her big sister, Gabriella, thought it'd be fun to squirt the remaining 30+ puffs out. The plan was to get to urgent care as soon as they opened, be the first ones seen, get a breathing treatment and maybe a steroid shot (as was given in the past), and make it out in time to watch Nathaniel's game. Justin kept the other three just in case it wasn't quick, so at least Nathaniel would still make it to his game. 

Lillie and I got to the clinic and waited about 20 minutes before being seen. The doctor checked her oxygen levels and they were low. 85-87 I think? Too low for an otherwise healthy child. They tried a breathing treatment, and her levels still didn't improve. He said he had no choice but to send us to the hospital. In fact, he insisted we travel by ambulance! Then, the plan changed again when he talked to her pediatrician, who insisted she be taken to Children's Hospital instead of the hospital down the road. 

It was scary. I called Justin at the game to let him know what was going on. He was scared too. Out of all our trips to the ER for bumps and scrapes and fevers that seemed too high, we'd never, ever experienced the urgency of an ambulance, or the seriousness of a children's hospital. (And I pray we never do again). I tried to remain calm. I couldn't become a hysterical mess with my precious three year old watching. I made slight conversation with the paramedic treating Lillie. She'd been doing her job for about ten years. I can't remember her name but I remember what she looked like. She was nice and good at her job and good at helping an anxious mom feel a little less anxious. Twenty minutes later, we arrived to Children's and had a whole team of doctors and nurses waiting on us. Several hours and even more breathing treatments later, we were admitted to a room because her levels were still not high enough. 

At the hospital the next morning

Justin took Nathaniel and Gabrie home that night; they weren't allowed to even go to Lillie's room because of the fragility of so many patients at Children's. Addie was allowed to stay with me at the hospital because she was breastfeeding. I can't speak highly enough of the staff; everyone was great. They really made you feel like your child's health was of utmost priority. We continued with breathing treatments and steroids throughout the night, and her levels were monitored continuously. Our expected stay time was at least two days, depending on her condition. 

My sweet, joyful Lillianna Mattison sang "Jesus Loves Me" to herself the entire night, even in her sleep! (And would have me sing it to her too). It was just precious. With each time she sang, her condition improved. By the middle of the night her levels were exactly where they were supposed to be and because her improvement was so great and stayed consistent, we were able to leave Sunday afternoon! I completely believe her songs to Jesus and lots of prayers were what helped her get well so quickly. I also believe that Gabrie's previous orneriness of wasting the inhaler was really a blessing in disguise, because I'm not sure I would've taken her in when I did if we had it. Her oxygen levels were dangerously low, nearing the point necessary of causing brain damage.

Last day of being a 3 year old!

Lillie just turned four last week and still loves to sing. On her birthday, Justin gave her a microphone (that we hook up into Nathaniel's amp). The kids all did a little show for us and one of her performances included "Jesus Loves Me". Yes, He does love us, Lillie. Thank you for always reminding me.

Becoming Midlanders

It's been two years since I last wrote something... a lot has changed since our family pizza night!
For starters, we had our third baby girl in July of 2014. If you know us in real life, you'd know that's not all that shocking. In fact, I'm pregnant now with our 5th baby, due this June. We feel extremely blessed to be adding another sweet baby to our family! About a year after family pizza night, we decided to move across town to this cute little house in the "country". It was an old house, tucked away on a side street in Broomfield, CO...not really in the country, but it felt like it to us. We had a nice, big yard with lots of trees and a beautiful garden, a greenhouse (that I regretfully never used), and tons of storage, plus lots of room for the kids to play and run. It was wonderfully isolated. The only nuisance we had to avoid was the weekly visit from the Jehovah's Witnesses. (That may sound mean, but I have good reasons for not wanting to be bothered every week with uninvited company.) Anyway, Emerald Lane was beautiful and only two minutes away from my favorite thrift store.

Last day at Emerald Lane

Moving across town felt like quite a journey at the time. We were no longer 5 minutes from Justin's work. The kids missed their neighborhood friends they had recently started playing with. King Soopers wasn't just a left turn away anymore... we'd grown quite spoiled on 104th. None of that compares to our even bigger change though, which is having moved to good ole' Midland, Texas.



Christmas 2015, we're back in Arkansas visiting family when Justin got a call from his boss. He was being offered a management position. Great news considering the recent decline in oil and countless jobs being snatched away from many of his colleagues. The catch? The job is in Odessa.

I quickly googled the area and checked out the map and topography. "It's pretty, stinkin close to New Mexico...I don't see much green on this map...Oh geez, this is the desert part of Texas.", I thought to myself. "Oh good, they at least have a Chick-fil-a." It was a difficult decision, but Justin and I agreed it would be best for the family to accept the offer.

The company gave us an all-expenses-paid-week in order to find a house. So, a couple weeks later, we embarked on the 10 hour drive to Midland, with all four kids in tow, for our house hunting trip. Five days and about 50 houses later, we finally found the right one. It's in a quiet neighborhood, with two big oak trees and a "cepan" tree (pecan), a backyard with plenty of room for the kids to play and only 6 minutes from Chick-fil-a. The inside is large enough for our growing family, and small enough for me to keep relatively clean. We are definitely happy with our choice. As far as the town, however, we are not thrilled, but we're trying to make the best of it.

Our last Christmas in CO

After our house hunt we returned back home to Emerald Lane. Our remaining time in Colorado would be short. We made the most of it by hanging out with friends and doing as many fun things as we could. In 12 short days, the movers would be there to pack away everything we own and we'd make the long drive back to Midland.

One upside to this transfer was having the company hire movers for us; that was pretty awesome! They literally did all of our packing and loading. All we had to do was show up (and answer a lot of questions like "do you want this packed with this? Are you taking this with you or are we taking it? And what room will this go in at the new house? What label should we put on this box?") Towards the end they got a little careless though and just started shoving things in boxes...

Anyway, we arrived in Midland on January 29th and moved into our new home two days later. Starting out we wanted to look at the move as an adventure. We're still trying to see the adventure in it. Right now it's just giving us the blahs. We have found a church we like though so that's good. But every time we leave the house we "worry" about getting in a wreck BECAUSE TEXANS CAN NOT DRIVE! (I exaggerate a little, but they really can't drive.) I remember my first time leaving the house since moving here...me and the kids went to get groceries, checked out the library, and of course, had Chick-fil-a. It was the first time (but not the last) that I got honked at for driving LEGALLY. It still baffles me. UPDATE: Today we witnessed the most epic driving mistake ever. A woman drove the wrong way on a one-way, all the while thinking the car she was about to crash into was in the wrong, and then she continued down the one-way and found her way onto the interstate STILL DRIVING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION! We'll see if she made it on the 6 o'clock news.

I think moving has definitely been the hardest on my sweet Nathaniel. He was involved in the most

Last Day at HSC--I embarrassed him in front of his teachers
so that's what the face is about.

awesome homeschooling program I've ever heard of. He had one Wednesday a week where it was all about what he enjoyed doing. No helping with younger sisters, no "school", no chores. All day long, he went from class to class with his friends and learned new and exciting things. We got transferred to Texas right at the start of his second semester at HSC. It was devastating. For him and me! He was able to attend three weeks into the new semester, which probably made it that much harder on him. Not only was leaving HSC devastating, but he also left behind some really great friends. Since we've been in Midland, he and I have had many, many talks about the importance of our move and Daddy's job. We've shared lots of tears and hugs and worked through countless meltdowns and bad attitudes. It's been tough. It breaks my heart to see him struggle with this change so deeply. I know that to him and his nine year old mind, this is the worst thing ever. On the flip side though, I think the situation has helped him become more responsible and mature. We've had some of our best school days here in Texas. He's transforming into this young man who makes jokes and enjoys my company and loves listening to his favorite band (Thousand Foot Krutch) while we encounter SO MANY horrible drivers on our way to Walmart. The transition from being a Coloradan to a Texan (and no, we will never be "Texans"!) has been difficult, to say the least, but I am beginning to see the end of that dark tunnel.

We got really spoiled living somewhere as cool as Colorado for almost four years. It was an awesome blessing for Justin to have gotten a good job right after graduating and in such a beautiful place! Not gonna lie, it was a sad and painful day when Justin registered our vehicles with Texas and replaced our green mountain license plate with a boring lone star plate. Nathaniel was especially ashamed of our van's new look. :)

I decided after our house hunting trip that I should try to find the beauty in West Texas. I've found a few glimmers so far and I'll keep on looking for it.

Laughing together at AFV

Daddy's HUGE new office 

Playing "boss"

Easter 2016