Because Two Fell In Love: Back To You

Roughly eight years ago (I can't believe it's been that long), mine and Justin's life changed forever. Unfortunately, our experiences through this life changing moment would be separate, but nonetheless things changed. Of course, most of you could guess, this "change" was our son, Nathaniel.

My first thoughts were of panic, naturally. And being only 17 at the time, they weren't the most mature or selfless of thoughts. "What am I going to do?". "How will we tell our parents?". "I'll have to quit dance classes!". "I'll never go to college.". "My life is over. (if my parents don't kill me, that is.)". Justin did his best to comfort me and tell me every thing would be ok...but I knew behind his reassuring words, he was feeling the same panic I was. Surprisingly, later that night I was a bit excited about having my own sweet baby.

One month later, Justin and I broke up. Don't get mad at him...it was my idea. My stupid, immature idea. I was scared, emotions were crazy and we didn't seem to get along as well as we used to. Panic set in again. Maybe I thought breaking up would make the situation go away for awhile. I don't know. I've really blocked alot of that time from my memory. I'm sure some of my actions were a result of hormones...but still inexcusable. Anyway, we didn't see each other through the entire pregnancy.

July 24, 2006 ~ We welcomed our sweet baby boy into the world. Sadly, this memorable occassion didn't change our attitudes or hearts toward each other.

Between 2006 and 2009, these hateful feelings we had for each other continued. Justin faithfully came to see his son. Despite how uncomfortable the situation was, or how I made him feel, he NEVER gave up on being a part of his life.

FAST FORWARD to November 2009....I prefer not to think about life before this point. Justin and I began texting. Mostly we'd talk about cute things Nathaniel would say or do, but eventually we talked about just life in general. Finally, we decided the three of us should hang out together. We met at Chuck E. Cheese one Friday night; it was incredibly awkward! I wasn't sure how to behave like "Is he paying for my food?"... I gave him $10 and a coupon for a $19.99 pizza and tokens. He accepted it. So clearly, it wasn't a date... But I still made sure to eat very lady-like, having only two slices of pizza. If you know me, you know that's NOT me; and I definitely out-eat him now!

The next night, Justin and I met again but by ourselves this time. We just sat and talked for hours. It was strange because it was like we picked up where we left off, but at the same time it felt so new. I was nervous!

Sunday, Justin and Nathaniel met me for lunch after church. I believe we went to a few stores after that...PetCo, Target, and Books-a-Million maybe? But the best part was that night... I asked "so do you love me again yet?". He replied with a simple "yes". My reply, "I've got a wedding to plan!".