Ten Years and Counting

Today Justin and I celebrate our 10th year together as a married couple. I'd love to write this post without sounding totally cliche, but I don't know that it's possible. Let's just get the first one out of the way now: Marriage is hard. We were warned in premarital counseling that marriage is hard. I remember the pastor telling us, "there will be days that you just don't 'feel' in love. You might wake up one day and just not want to be married to this person anymore. Love is a choice."

At the time I thought that was the craziest thing anyone has ever said about marriage. I didn't understand... what does he mean, it's a "choice"? The only choice I could really wrap my head around was the choice to get married in the first place. The pastor went on to talk about some personal stories about how he felt he had to choose his wife, and honestly, I don't remember what those stories were because all I could think about was the whole "love is a choice" thing. I thought, "No way. That's not how either of us feel. We DO love each other, we don't have to choose love."

Over the years, (I still don't feel qualified to give "marriage advice") I have learned what that pastor really meant by his statement. It's why so many marriages end up in divorce. Somebody decided to stop choosing love. We had decided when we first got back together that divorce or breaking up wouldn't be on the table. Not an option. Nathaniel was almost four when we got married, and because he hadn't been born to see us break up the first time, we didn't want him to have to actually experience it. If we're gonna be together, we're gonna be together. Period.

Now, I feel super lucky because Justin and I have a really great relationship. We're best friends. We're almost the same person, especially the longer we're together. We complement each other amazingly. The love part comes naturally, 90% of the time. The other 10%, it's usually his fault. (just kidding!). But really, if soul mate is a thing, we definitely found it. We've had our struggles, we've been ridiculous, moody, and downright selfish--that's where the "love is a choice" comes in for us.

I actually can't think of any more cliches to fill this post with-- I googled some to see if I could apply them and they were just depressing and very reflective of what the world says about marriage. I'm glad they don't apply! I did, however, find some cute quotes to share:

"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." -Mignon McLaughlin

"The difference between an ordinary marriage and an extraordinary marriage is in giving just a little extra everyday, as often as possible, for as long as we both shall live." -Fawn Weaver

"A happy marriage is a selfless journey in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own." -George and Yvonne Levy

"A long-lasting marriage is built by two people who believe in--and live by--the solemn promise they made." -Darlene Schacht

A whole decade, Justin. I know there were people who didn't think we'd make it past a year or so. (I love proving people wrong). Most of all, I am so happy I have you. I'll choose you, every single day. 

Today was the most perfect day. 

I love you.

I love this picture!